I've Noticed... That Some Things Are Not Designed To Be Words On A Page

I've Noticed... that it is very challenging for me to explain the essence of being Noticed.  I have come to understand that being Noticed means the most to those who have actually been Noticed, and the joy of Noticing can only be felt once you've experienced the Noticed Motif turning from the gift of a small "key chain" to a treasured keepsake. 

If you've stumbled on to this blog and are unfamiliar with The Noticed Network and the concept of Noticing, I will do my best to explain...

• The Noticed Network is the original epicenter of an actual, rather that virtual, network of women who are inspired to Notice and celebrate the amazing women in their lives just for being their amazing selves.  I say actual because these women are actually connecting with each other.  Whether it is in person (let's say over coffee maybe) or by mail, the Noticing takes place woman to woman.  (I just love that part!  Our world is often hurried and virtual, and especially as women we have a huge need for real connection.)  (524 Characters)

•  The concept of Noticing really is simple, yet powerful.  The giver, or the Noticer if you will, gives the recipient a heartfelt compliment (basically tells her the good things she has Noticed about her), and a Noticed Motif. The Motif is so important because is serves as a reminder over and over again that the woman was Noticed just for being herself. (355 Characters)

• The Noticed Motif is sold by The Noticed Network.  It is a lot like a key chain, although the recipient is encouraged to clip it on her purse, keys, or wherever she will see it often.  The name Noticed Motif was chosen to define these items in a very special way.  These are not just key chains or bag tags.  They are symbols of a common theme running through the tapestry of the human experience.  A Noticed Motif is a tangible reminder to the woman who received it, and it tells others that she has been Noticed as a beautiful part of that tapestry.  (551 Characters)

• Often once a woman has been Noticed she Notices the amazing women in her own life.  We call this the Ripple Effect of Goodness.  As all of these ripples spread The Noticed Network grows.  (186 Characters)

• To Notice a woman is to take the time to tell her why she is amazing just for being herself.  You are in a sense saying, "I see you, I hear you, you matter to me.".  And this is one of the best gifts you can give a woman.  When a woman know she is Noticed it changes her.  It validates her.  When she feels gratitude toward her own goodness, she wants to let her light shine a little brighter.  When she feels Noticed the world is a better place, and she wants to create her own Ripple Effect of Goodness by Noticing the amazing women in her own life. (551 Characters)

It is this last statement that gets me so excited!  The thought that as each woman is Noticed her light shines brighter, and then she wants to share with others so that their lights shine brighter, too.  It is the goal of the Noticed Network that every woman in the world will be Noticed and validated.  And I for one can't wait to see the bright lights burning.

In this virtual, and often viral world that we live in it would seem possible that every woman should experience being Noticed sooner rather than later.  With Facebook and Twitter we should be able to get the word out about Noticed and grow this movement over night, but I struggle to put the essence of the gift that is "Noticed" into 140 characters.  There are no graphics to post that depict a woman who felt invisible realizing that she has been Noticed just for being her amazing self.

I suppose there are a lot of experiences like that.  It would be nearly impossible to tell you in 140 characters what it felt like when I became a wife, or a mother.  Some things require experience to truly understand.  Some things are not designed to be words on a page.

So for now we will continue to do our best to share The Noticed Network with the world, and we will continue to support women as they create their own ripple effects of goodness.  Most importantly, we will be patient. The Noticed Network is not founded on the virtual or viral.  We are founded on the principle that we, the women who's lights are shining brighter because we are Noticed, will share this gift. Although you will continue to see us on Facebook and Twitter, we will not rely on the words on a page to explain the true essence of being Noticed.  We will rely on real women to share Noticed with the world.

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Hope to see you in the arena

I've Noticed... the insight of Dr. Brene Brown, Ph.D.  I recently stumbled upon her 2010 and 2012 TED talks.  When I say stumbled upon, I really mean it.  I was actually searching the internet for something entirely different when I came across Dr. Brown's talks.  Everything happens for a reason, right?  I clicked out of curiosity, but now I know I was meant to hear her words, both for my own personal understanding and to share at least this highlight with all of you.  The subject matter of these talks was vulnerability and shame.  Dr. Brown's insight and candor made listening to her speak on such ugly topics bearable, and her good humor made it enjoyable.  We all experience, to one degree or another, feelings of vulnerability, and most of us avoid this ucky feeling whenever possible.   Dr. Brown pointed out that when we avoid feeling vulnerable, that is when we numb ourselves so as to not feel it, or we avoid really putting ourselves out there so that we won't really be judged, we also lose the joy, the happiness, and the courage that we want to have and be. 

Dr. Brown ended her 2012 TED talk with a beautiful word picture using a quote from Teddy Roosevelt's well-known "The Man in the Arena".  She spoke of how we all have this fantasy that when we get it all together, when we are thin enough, organized enough, schooled enough, ________ enough... then we will walk into the arena.  Then we will stand before our peers ready to be seen because we will be perfect, we will be bullet proof. But then she goes on to say something very profound.  She says, "Even if you got as perfect as you could and as bullet proof as you could possibly muster, when you got in there, that's not what we want to see.  We want you to go in; we want to be with you and across from you, and we just want for ourselves and the people we care about, and the people we work with to dare greatly."

I for one can admit that I have stood just outside of the door to the arena.  My mind racing with all of the tasks and to do's that, once accomplished, will grant me the worthiness to enter.  I can also see with profound gratitude that had I ever accomplished that elusive to do list and then thrown the door wide open, and then proceeded to stride into your arena with the confidence of perfection and the conceit of a bullet proof vest I would have had my heart broken into a million pieces, because I would have been untouchable.  I would not have been able to really connect with anyone, which is all any of us want.  We want to be seen, really seen.  We want to be valued, really valued.  We want to be Noticed, really Noticed. 

And so here I go... I am as prepared as I can be.  Am I perfect?  LOL.  Am I bullet proof?  Nope.  Am I opening the door, and walking into the arena?  Absolutely!  I hope to see you there!!!

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."        ~Theodore Roosevelt

You can watch both the 2010 TEDxHouston talk and the 2012 TED talk of Dr. Brown's at: http://www.brenebrown.com/speaking



 

Can't see the forest without the trees

I've noticed that there is a time and a place for everything, and sometimes the details- or the trees- need to be in focus. 

When I've heard the expression "Can't see the forest for the trees", I've always thought, "That is not me.  I don't want to live a life so consumed by the details that I can't enjoy the forest."  Now I'm thinking a little differently. 

Don't get me wrong, I am a forest kind of girl.  I am a visionary.  I love the grand.  When I close my eyes I see the forest, the big picture.  It's not that I don't enjoy the journey, it's just that truth be told, whether immature or not, I can't wait to get the destination.  I can't wait for all the trees to come together to create the forest of my dreams.  But the fact is all the trees must come together to create the forest.  Every tree matters.  Every tree needs to be seen.

The easy example for me here is The Noticed Network.  Our goal is that every woman in the world will be Noticed, that is our forest.  But how wonderful that in order for our forest to even exist we must see, and hear, and Notice every woman, metaphorically every tree.  And just like trees every woman is amazing in her own unique way. 

So I've Noticed that the expression "Can't see the forest for the trees"  needs to be tweaked a bit to work for me.  I'm changing it just a little to say "Can't see the forest without the trees" 

We live in a very busy, very fast paced world.  Even though Noticing women is my passion, there are still women in my life who I have not yet had the priveledge of Noticing.  I was able to Notice one of those women today.  As you've heard me say before, I believe in Divine timing, and I know today was the perfect time to Notice her.  Taking the time to shift my focus from the big picture to Noticing this amazing woman made the forest bigger, and it made it grander.

We all live in our own forest, surrounded by our own trees.  This metaphor can be used to explain so many different things, situations, and people in our lives.  Sometimes the forest is full of happiness, what I like to call abundance of the grand, and sometimes it is full of hard times, and overwhelming situations.  It is my belief that we can not see the forest without the trees.  The trees are the details and one of the best things to focus on are the details about the amazing women in our lives.  Taking the time to really see the true beauty in the women in your life and then Noticing them for being their amazing selves blesses both you and the women you Notice. 

Here's to the beautiful forest made possible by each beautiful tree.

Reconnecting Lollipop Moments

http://www.ted.com/talks/drew_dudley_everyday_leadership.html

This short video was just recently sent to me by a friend of mine, and I just love it. I hope you can take a few minutes to watch it.

I've noticed that our lives can be changed by the smallest of things.  Just think... if this guy hadn't shown up with the lollipops... What might have happened? What if he had just handed the lollipop to the girl rather than including the innocent bystander (her future husband)? What if the girl's parents had acted differently, or if the crowd hadn't laughed? I believe that everything happens for a reason. Even the fact that you are reading this right now is no coincidence. Drew was just being himself by passing out the lollipops, and we are just being ourselves every day when we are out and about in the world, making a difference in the lives of those we come in contact with.

The lollipop story is great all by itself. Just like I tell my kids stories of when I met their dad, this story is its own memoir. The goodness of the story is magnified however, when in gratitude, it is shared. There is great power in reconnecting lollipop moments. This girl could have gone her entire life without sharing her story with Drew, but look at the positive impact it has had on his life and the lives of everyone who has heard his message. When we take the time to reconnect with those who have touched our lives we keep that goodness alive. We inspire each other with the belief that what we do and who we are matters. It makes us want to be our best. It makes the world a better place.

This whole concept is what Noticing others is all about. Taking the time to tell the women in our lives that we have Noticed them. That simply being themselves has impacted who we are, and has made the world a better place. Taking the time to reconnect by sharing how grateful we are that they are a part of our lives.

When we know that we are Noticed, and are regularly reminded of that, we smile more, we are more intentional, and we make our world an even better place. It's as simple as that.

Here's to an Amazing 2012

As we begin a new year I, like so many of you, have been reflecting on the past year.  It's so hard for me to believe that this time last year "Noticed" and The Noticed Network was not even a figment of my imagination.  Part of me can't believe that it has been less than 6 months since we went live with The Noticed Network.  The other part of me can't hardly remember my life with out The Noticed Network being a part of it.  As many of you who know me well have heard me say,  I am in line with my universal purpose when I am Noticing the amazing women in my life.  As I reflect over the past 6 months I can see the faces of each of you that I have personally been privileged to Notice.  You are all such amazing women and I am so grateful for each one of you.  I am also so excited about the ripple effect of goodness that is possible with Noticed as it is moving across the country and even around the world.  Every time that The Noticed Network receives an order for Noticed Motifs whether from someone who has been noticed or from someone previously unknown to The Noticed Network the ripple has the potential to spread, and with that, the dream that every woman in the world will be Noticed becomes more real.

As I look forward to 2012, I do so with great anticipation.  There are still so many women that I can't wait to Notice personally.  And the timing of these encounters will be perfect.  I am certain of this because of my experiences with Noticing thus far.  So many of you have shared stories with me about how you were Noticed at just the right time in your life (i.e. on a particularly hard day or just as you really needed encouragement).  I am always prayerful before sharing with someone that I have Noticed her.  I am also keenly aware that The Noticed Network is in large part a mission.  God has blessed me and the women who have been touched by Noticed.  As you and I are a part of Noticed, God is a part of Noticed and therefore I have come to appreciate Devinne timing.  The women who will be Noticed in 2012 will be Noticed in that perfect timing and I just can't hardly wait for all that goodness to manifest itself!  thenoticednetwork.com has evolved so much in just 6 months, and there are so many plans for the near future.  I can't wait to share it all with you!

So... I've noticed that being Noticed had such a positive impact on our lives in 2011.  I've noticed that being reminded that we are Noticed by catching a glimpse of our Motifs or hearing a reminder of just how amazing we are is a vital part of the gift that is Noticed.  And I've Noticed that this is only the beginning.  Every woman should experience the gift of being seen, of being heard, or being appreciated just for being her amazing self.  There are so many women to be Noticed!  Here's to 2012, may it be a year as amazing as you are!!!

Adventure Outside Of My Immediate Circle

I've Noticed that noticing the women outside of my immediate circle of friends and family brings with it a sense of adventure, and a better understanding of just how similar we as women really are.  When I notice women who are "like me" certain assumptions are made.  I know that the recipient will respond within the social norms that I am comfortable with.  Stepping outside of my box to Notice a woman who seems quite different from me brings with it a challenge that I am becoming more and more intrigued with.  It is my nature to try to connect with those around me.  I am a true extrovert, so the more people I can really connect with in a day the better.  What I am realizing about human connection is that it can be real and at the same time unfamiliar.  Typically, when we think about connecting with the people in our lives we consider those closest to us.  We know what these relationships feel like, we know what to expect.  We can read into their facial expressions and body language much easier because it is similar to our own.  When we step outside of the box to connect with those different than ourselves we may need to go about it a little differently.   When I Notice a women who seems so different than myself, I must reach her where she's at.  In stepping out of my box I am stepping out of myself... stepping into her shoes for a moment, so that I can speak with her in a way that she can understand.  And while I'm in her shoes I realize how much we are alike.  We are alike because we are humans, we are women, we want to be seen and heard and appreciated just for being ourselves.  Noticing is all about seeing the goodness in another and letting her know you Noticed.  Noticing is a gift, and like all gifts it needs not only to be given but to be received. 

Women are always asking me how to Notice the women in their lives, and I'm formulating a new approach.  First, decide who you want to Notice and what you want to Notice about her.  Then secondly, think about how she would best receive the gift.  Do that.   It is my dream that every woman in the world will be Noticed.  Adventure awaits :)

Women Really are Complicated.

I have recently noticed that women really are complicated. I suppose I have not wanted this notion to be true in the past because complicated to me meant difficult, hard to deal with and stressful.  And although being complicated can lead to those things, it's actually more complex than that.  (Please note I said more complex not more complicated:) Being complicated is a result of being so full of life.  Being complicated is actually exciting, intriguing, and beautiful.  We are all our own tapestries of thoughts, feeling, words, actions, intentions, promises, desires, and sometimes even regrets. And as with all tapestries, what people look at when they see us greatly depends on how close they are to a particular part of the big picture.  Each woman that I have Noticed has had her own unique reaction.  And although I have never anticipated what a particular reaction will be, I have been surprised by my experiences.  Women who I see as beautiful have responded with shock and disbelief when I've told them so.  Women who always seem strong and in control have cried uncontrollably.  Women who I would have never expected to get excited about Noticing the women in their own lives have been so eager to do so.  What I have realized is that often even in a casual situation of Noticing some one, I touch her heart.  Taking the time to Notice something good about a woman and then taking the time to tell her what I've Noticed touches a place in her heart that seems often overlooked.  When a woman is Noticed for some good quality, let's say her beauty for example, she isn't  just hearing the compliment that comes with being Noticed.  She's not just hearing the words "Amy, I've noticed what a beautiful person you are on the inside and the out..."  Nope.  She's hearing that message as it relates to all the threads of her tapestry.   She hearing that as it relates to the conversation she had with her husband earlier, and a conversation she had with her girlfriends last week.  We are complicated, but I think it's wonderful.  We are complicated because we are so full of life, and this makes Noticing the women in our lives even more important.  Because with so much to take in and so much to process, with so many words to be said and so many words to be heard, it is so important that we share goodness with each other.  We need to be reminded that we are amazing just the way we are.  We need to be reminded over and over.  That's what I love about the Noticed Motif!  It reminds its recipient of the fact that in this complicated world that we live in she is amazing just for being herself!!